…is always a huge spoon full of crow, humble pie, and your own words. Everyone I have hurt or wronged has always seem to have gotten their revenge. It may not have been them that took it but for some reason my sense of right and wrong run deep. Not to say that I dont deliberately do the wrong thing sometimes. But I do know where that line is.
I find that when i cross that line, it seems to always, without fail, come back around on me. This wouldnt bother me so much if I saw it or new it happened to more people that have fucked me over.
***There is one person that i know has theirs coming… no doubt in my mind, so im not worried about that.***
But for now we will address the current situation, I fucked up. And i have fucked up before in many instances and maybe if i keep getting burnt enough i will learn. However, on the other hand the one time i played by the rules, was the one time i really got screwed by the perverbial refs! So playing stone cold clean gets you know where. Playing dirty like the rest of the world gets your know where…
My question is if life constantly gives you lemons no matter the choices you make, is it acceptable to just to worry about the end result and live continuously in the moment?
I see now why so many people turn there backs toward God. Its never just because of one thing. Its a compilation of multiple things. It’s learning your lesson from something then changing what you do or who you are into the person your “should be.” A Better person. Then getting told that its wrong again. You keep making these blind changes and it keeps coming up as Incorrect or Access Denied.
I was hurt! That being said lets go back into the football mentality of stop making excuses cause you will only have yourself to blame because in the end that is the only thing you will ever be able to control. Is YOURSELF. So Yes. Its my fault. I’m sorry. With that in mind lets go back. I was hurt and trying to figure out if i was gonna land on my feet or if i was just gonna be strung along for a few more weeks. So in an attempt to brighten my spirits a group of guys came over and decided to cheer me up. Whats the best was to cheer up someone who just got dumped? Either give them a hug and let em cry and vent, or bash their ex. Since guys don’t do the first the latter is what happened. In this bashing they were shown our “Alternative blog.” They asked can we read it, and i said sure do whatever you want. So I made the mistake of leaving three 18 year olds with my lap top and a personal blog shared by my ex and myself thinking that “do whatever you want” would not come back and bite me in the ass.
Well, well, well. Here I sit, months after the fact, and it has seemed to bit me in the ass again. I was hurt and actively did nothing. But with everyone I could blame I sit, knowing it is my fault. Wishing I could have changed it. Wishing i could do something to make it right, or make amends. ____ ____ ____, I do not want to hate you. I do not want to cause you anymore stress or damage than what already has been done. I know that somehow I have caused irreparable damage to what little relationship we had let if any at all or any chance at a social one in the future, all by doing nothing. Maybe if I had gotten on to check it one more time I would have been able to take it down before it got to this point. I had no idea. But ignorance is no excuse. If you can find it somewhere to forgive me that would be nice. If not I can totally understand. Coming from the person who is the king of grudges I understand.
I hate camping. HATE IT. Especially this half ass camping, where you get a long cabin that is the size of a normal living room with AC but not kitchen or bathroom. This whole thing made the experience a living hell. And even more so last night. I could not sleep, making phone cal after phone call to whoever i could trying to figure out what went wrong and what to do and if there was any way at salvaging this wreck. When I did finally find out and tried to sleep I found out that woodpeckers like log cabins for breakfast around 5 in the morning.
I have been led on, lied to, cheated on, and now hurt someone who i once cared so deeply for and her family, as well as someone who finally made me happy. And all of this… ALL of it, is my fault. This is not a pity party or a feel sympathy for Grey moment. It is just a realization that you can only control yourself and in the end no matter what others actions are the only person any one has to blame is the same person staring back in the mirror. I wish desperately that i could do something to make it all right. I wish that could be my fault to. If I can be responsible for all the shit in my life then i would really like to be responsible for making it right again. To all, I am sorry.
Fantastic. Who would have thought a week later I would be in this position. God works in really awesome ways.
And You know, she was right. The Next one is always better.
Thank you for your kind words. Just so you know I still have tremendous respect for you, your husband, son, and youngest daughter. I miss them all and wish them the best. If I were to see anyone of you out I would have no hesitation in talking to any of you. You were nothing but loving and welcoming with open arms. All of you. For that I thank you.
I love, I laugh, I hurt, I heal, I learn, I love… again. That is how I’m wired.
Alright, I am sorry to all who have followed me and have had to put up with my whiny post for the past month! I know, I’m a lil bitch. However this will be the close of this horrible chapter, I promise.
I have thought and thought and I have realized that I am no longer mad or upset or have much distaste for my ex at all. All because of three events that have happened and one that keeps occurring.
The First is the fact that she left me for another guy. I can list all kinds of reasons for why this was a stupid move on her part but I will refrain from speaking ill of her. After all she is a child and does not know any better. The grass is always greener I suppose. Especially since I go to school in Georgia and she attends school in Tennessee. Being someone who is as sexual as she is I’m sure that the temptation of physical pleasure was more overwhelming than the willingness to wait a couple weeks for me. This whole thing means that I did nothing wrong. I never degraded her. I treated her like an equal. Never above me but certainly not below. She was my partner. If she didnt want that well then I guess the loyal loving type is not HER type.
The Second come from what happened later that night after I found out the whole story from her. I sat on the bench on our church softball game and explained to a friend what had happened. At the end of this story I revealed my ex’s new romantic interest. The person I was in conversation with revealed to me an exchange of words held between her boyfriend and my ex’s new male the day before where the “other guy” bragged about all of his hot sexual encounters he had in the past couple weeks with all these girls. Including this one who would come over, write his papers for him then fuck him. She left me for someone who she just “fell for him and his family” but doesn’t know that he is doing the same thing to her she did to me. PRICELESS!!! :)
And the third and possibly most satisfying event that is blessing my soul are her friends. The friends who I had meet maybe one time and others I had never talked to in my life, coming out of the wood works, 7 now all together, apologizing to me for the way she treated me. That they do not know what is wrong with her and that she is not the same friend they used to hang out with. Her own friends, the same ones she swears by are the ones who look down on her in disgust wondering what the hell she is doing! Now I hate that her friends can’t come out and tell her this on their own but I can say I have tried before and it only produces a Pissed off C.E.W.(her name) and drama so I can’t fully blame them for not wanting to.
Now, the good that came out of this is I have made many new friends. Stole hers mostly. I at least got a little bit of her aspect on life and tolerance of people. But what I am really excited about is the net $300 dollars profit I made off selling the Alanis Morissette tickets I had bought her for her birthday. :)
Do I wish and pray for bad things for her? Not anymore. So No.
Do I hopes she learns a lesson somewhere down the road? Hell Yes
So the form or package that lesson comes wrapped in is up to the Gods.
I have learned never to say never. However, I am happy now and over it. What takes my mind off of her lies and cheating is seeing Adam with his girlfriend. They are perfect for each other. She is a little childish and acts about 7 years younger than she really is but the fact that they work and he is happy makes my heart melt. I have never seen him like this before and I am so happy that he finally has a taste of or even the full thing or what I have had a few times. I love you Doak.
The race for the summer to end is off and underway.
To get this out of the way so I don’t have to come back to it, you are so angry, hateful, and not the happy person you once were. I have been positive and supportive and up beat. Here I was thinking and worrying that you were happy without me and in fact nothing I do will make you happy. You Were such a pleasant person with me and without me its draining just trying to have a civil conversation with you over text message let-alone over the phone. Im not saying that You need me or that i make you a better person. It’s just that ever since this happened, you have been almost impossible to handle, but here I stand still smiling with open arms wanting to just give you and hug and a kiss on the forehead. Yes, I will be fine without you. And we all know damn well that you will be fine without me even if you have to prove it to everyone you come in contact with. But I really think you are about to shove something out of your life in dramatic fashion, and I mean DRAMATIC fashion, that you might look back in the future and wish you hadn’t been so 100% on your stance, and maybe taken a slower approach to the situation.
It’s never been a good time for you.
Well, I cant say that this summer will be a good time for me. So don’t be surprised if you find it hard to get a hold of me.
I still feel you. Always will. I meant it when I said it. Did you? You have already lied about enough.
Mike will get his lens cap… I might lose the other stuff though. IDK…. to be continued…..
In any movie, story or even life it always ends the same. We see problems from a distance, and its at a certain point we need to decide to start a journey or begin to prepare against the oncoming struggle. But think of it as a person in the middle of a field. At one end of the field is a river; cool and refreshing. At the other end of that field and wild fire, relentless and sparing nothing. As this person makes his way toward the river there are always complications or strings of events that slow down the progression to that safe river. Slowing down to help someone else, or even taking time to smell the roses while you still can before they are claimed by the fire. As you get closer to the river it seems the fire is closing in closer on you than you are to the rive. As the fire claims you, there is still a final attempt as you reach out and touch the edge of the water and your fingers sink through the cold, wet, life giving gift that is heaven. The feeling rushes from your finger tips through your arm into your shoulder and just like water behind a dam floods into your body cavity. The feeling of that cool running water flows over your heart lungs and into your head then behind your eyes. Its odd because even though no water entered the body and the flames rip and the flesh and dry everything to a empty burned shell, a few tears manage to escape and roll down the face, cooling and soothing all the pain away.
It is in that moment that the lines between suffering and life, heaven and hell, Happiness and torture, are blurred and for one instance that lasts a life time people can either hate the things that lead them to meet that wild fire or love every bit of pain they feel because it was the culmination of all that had been good. Hate what was good or love the pain.
"If I only could make a deal with God, and get him to swap our places. Be running up that road, be running up that hill, be running up that building. If I only Could."
Find a really big steep hill. One that you couldn’t possibly make it up at a dead sprint. Run up it as fast as you can. Till you can’t go any further. See how close you feel to God.
I will start this off with BAD and I will end it with GOOD. Why is the fuck do people think putting themselves in a position to where they lose control of their body is a good idea! Do you trust me that much? You shouldn’t! I may be nice and a pushover but I am vindictive. Very much so. I would have been content with letting YOU walk to the delt house to get YOUR ass kicked. I would have been more than happy to let the former girlfriend that just broke up with YOU about 6 hours ago to have slapped the ever loving hell out of YOUR drunk ass after YOU cussed her out cause she spilled YOUR beer! And for the drunk fuck who got mad at me for dancing with your EX gf and tried to whip my ass, I would have no qualms with making sure your GDI ass never makes it down to ANY fraternity house. Then we will see how well you can keep those jealous eyes on her. I am tired of Drunk Fucks coming out and thinking that oh.. there will be someone there who will take care of it. Even though I did, I wont always be there, and I wont always be wiling to. For the three fuck-ups that I am referring to, if you catch yourselves in another compromising position do not look to me for a hand out. You got your get out of jail free card from Grey already.
Now for the good. I’m so sorry. Dawo, you need to know that I am sorry for giving you advice that I cant even follow myself. The advice is good. It is worth it. It will pay off. But I am telling you to do as I say not as I do. That is not fair. I am just hoping that you might be stronger than me in the end when it comes down to decision time. Even during your pledge-ship when everybody said you weren’t going to be able to get it, I told you you could. I believed in you. I believe in you. You got this man. I love you. Thank you for opening up to me today. I will promise to the Big Bro you need me to be. When the heart, or the world for that matter is suffering it always chooses to heal itself or at least it compensates in another way to offset the pain. While everyone was being childish and irresponsible, Jerry J. and Kristen P., the two voted least likely to act mature shined above the rest and set the example of how to drink and be adults at a party. So thank you Heart and world for compensating in such a glorious way. Finally thank you for tonight. one step at a time and this was a step in the right direction. I love it.
For Overall Personal Best goes to……. Grey Clevenger.
"Wow, I was not expecting this. This is such a great honor. There are so many people i would like to thank. First off I would like to thank my Dad. For so long it has just seemed like me and him against the world. He kept pushing me, and nothing was ever good enough. But then at my breaking point, he always told me that it was always good enough. Me being his son was enough. Secondly, I would like to thank God, because it is not socially acceptable to not thank the Lord and savior, who without nothing is possible, or otherwise face extreme consequences. Next I would like to thank Cody Furse for believing in me. The support you give me is the driving factor of my success. You are my father away from home. My brother I never had. The friend I deserve. The motivator I need. No words could describe how much all you do means to be. Next, is to the men of Alpha Delta Gamma. Half of you shits haven’t done a damn thing for me and would turn your back on me in a second. BUT, I thank all of you for being the one that bigger than me that I love being apart of. I can see, touch, taste and feel all of us grow only because we value the Fraternity. Maybe not each other, but the importance we place on the group is why we are who we are and how we have been able to come so far. Now, I would like to thank (Insert 5 different names), only for nothing other than transforming me. I love who I am. I love the way I am. Lastly I would like to go back and Thank God. I thank him for the broken road. And this "thank you" is not like the first one which was a prerequisite for the other "thank you’s" post-ceding it. No, this thank you is for placing the right people in my life and the right moments and always reminding me that I am made in your image. You are passionate, sincere, truthful, loving, loyal, and you always stick to your word. When you say you will do something you never waver. And you are one smooth attractive sombitch!
Parts of me hopes that is not about me. All of me does actually. You aren’t my Doctor, or my hidden idol. I love you cause it makes me feel good. I like to love you. I have not done anything to hurt you. Nor would I. And to think that I am sport for you and that you would takes the wind out of my chest. It is real. It is not fake. I am Still here and I Still feel you! 11 days!
I have amazing friends. Let me put that out there first. And the places where i think i will find support that turns out to be dried up wells are always replaced by unspuspected people willing to reach out a hand.
I’m feeling a lot better physically- I guess my medicine finally kicked in. Fuck! if I had only waited another day. So thank you person who encouraged me to talk.
I’m feeling better emontionally as well. For now. Maybe I just need someone from time to time to pour all this out to so i have room to fill it back up.
I wish you hadn’t. But i understand why you did. I have done it to others but never really had t happen to me. But i cant even see you. (breath… breatthhhhhhhhh) ok.
I promised i wouldnt text or call. However i do not recall discussing anything about mail. I am sending you something in the mail at some point in time. when you get it your can burn it or not even open it at all. But You said you wanted to see it. So it’s not entriely finished but im sure that wont make a difference to you. Any way.
I can be ok for 11 more days. I think I can do it. Then im home for the summer. But I am already and still here. And will continue to be. You may not know why but i do. and i will tell you when i get home.
»»just remember what Mike said, Its not always gonna be easy dating someone who is good looking. but we all know who he was talking about. lol ahahahaha lol lol lol rolflmfao…hehe… and all that jazz. smile!«««
Where does the term Hopeless Romantic Come from? Is it really hopeless?
Where do people get the ides to write movies and books and stories with happy endings where everything seems to be falling apart and then in the last 5 minutes it all come full circle 300x faster than it fell apart? Where does if come from? Why does it not happen?
I mean the only reason that people who pray and hope for a miracle to happen is because they have faith and because it has happened before. There are true events and factual accounts of people being taken off of a ventilator to die and then make a recovery as soon as they pull the plug. The lugs keep inflating and deflating. The muscle still work. The heart continues to beat. And the ones who cry over it and go day by day hoping and praying for a miracle to happen get what they hoped for when all hope was gone.
That doesn’t seem to be the case for romantics. The science is never an exact science, and matters of the heart can change on a dime. They can go from being as convincing and firm as rock then go to the strength of jello then without warning just evaporate. And then when all hope is lost its back to that rock again. So its even less of a science. A deep amount of faith, prayer and hoping goes into love. Maybe love is more of a religion. There really is not easy way to EASE into it. You like and you like and you like until you just know then you have to take that leap. You hope and pray that the other person’s arms that you land will find there way around your body and hold you. As the feeling takes you higher and higher it becomes more evident and more terrifying that if your partner lets go how much this is going to hurt the higher you get. Likewise for the partner it is a growing concern that the higher you both go if I lose my grip or am not strong enough to hold my love it will only hurt them worse the higher we go. Solution: Drop them at the first sight of weakness and let them tumble for a few feet, bruise their ass and come away with a few minor scraps while the real pain gets to set in while they watch you fly over the hills and out of sight?
No. I tell you why.
Lining up on the ball, knowing that this game winning touchdown pass is coming to you and you are the one that your whole team is counting on, you let them down more if you walk off the field than if you try. Ben Stone, I hate you but I would be nervous too. Maryville vs William Blount. Close game. You choked. But you tried.
Skydiving! You dont know 100% that your shute will open. But you Trust it. Why? Because someone who you trust, someone who is supposed to know what they are doing told you it would.
This is the second time i have been in this situation. Free falling hoping that my chute will open and that i wont slam into the ground. I know what is gonna happen if it doesn’t. I know how its gonna feel. It will probably hurt a little more since i jump from a higher altitude. I know the rehabilitation time. I know i will live and eventually be fine. But i really really really really really really want that chute to open.
So i don’t know why they call us hopeless romantics. I do not think we are without hope. I’m not good a reading into things and I don’t get a lot of things easily. Typically, i have to be spoon fed meanings. But i hope that you can do a better job than me when i say, I knew the risks when I say the plan. I knew the risks when i put on the gear. I knew the risks when i got in the plan. I knew the risks when I began to climb into the cloud. I knew the risks when I jumped. I knew. You are super-girl. You are all over the place saving the world. One innocent deserving child at a time. I know you are busy. And i understand if you cant. But if you could spare some time I would appreciate it if you could come save me. I’d like to be the person who takes care of super-girl at the end of the day after she is tired and needs some rest from saving the world.
Lastly, I don’t know who I am right now. I am acting erratically, I’m jumpy, and I’m just not who you knew me as. And i am sorry. I shouldn’t have contacted everyone and their mom. I shouldn’t have keep texting and calling. I should have trusted you. I should have done the very thing that kept us going for so long. And that is believe you. I am lost without you, cause i liked who i was when i was with you. So right now I do not know who I am. I’m still the same guy though. Still here. Always here. Patiently waiting.
Not because of our situation. Well…. yes but even more so for a different reason. Maybe this would suck less if i had you here. It hurts. Like for real. Physical pain. Not emotional. I have had plenty of that. I wish i could have talked to you but I wont be like he was. I wont ask for sympathy. I am fine. Just wish i could have a kiss on the forehead of mine that really just wont stop pounding. Why does football still have to bit me in the ass years after i stop playing.
I type this prayer on here as I pray it in my head so that I may never forget. I thank you for your Amazing Grace. Thank you for your love and forgiveness. I say this prayer in hopes that you will help me fulfill my desire to Love without anything in return. You gave me the gift to love unconditionally and it has been a true blessing for me. I want it to be a blessing to other people as well. Please, help me, give me opprotunity to love without wanting in return and maybe, just maybe if I am lucky I will be loved in return. Everybody has a little piece of heaven on earth. It hurt God. But it was soooo worth it. So Thank you for my little piece of heaven.
My phone buzzed 3 times in class today and each time I about ripped my fucking pocket out trying to get to get to it thinking that it could be you. It wasnt.. but you know that. Thats just how it is these days. I just should stop and maybe leave my phone alone but then im sure when i do that i will miss that one text of that one time you try to call.
The more i thought about it the more i may let you. You said you wanted to see this 30 some odd page book i have done. Well read the title. This is in no way incentive but if you do chose me, i will let you. Hell, maybe you will be impressed with how creative i can be. I guess it just takes that kind of situation to bring it out in me.
Im still not at all comfortable. Just know that. I dont think “i have this in the bag she is coming back.” Last night was ….. fantastic. Thank you for just talking to me. It helped for the moment. But this morning i woke up to the same familiar uncertainty that i have been waking up with. You would think that this whore called uncertainty would stop creeping into my bed every night but nothing stops her. But while waking up with uncertainty i also eat breakfast with stubbornness. Stubborn to the fact of that I will always be there. No not outside your window, and No not spying on your every move. But there. To talk. To love you. To hold you if you want or need it. To be a friend. To be ears for venting. For casual outings around town. Until you realize that you wont get rid of me and your better off just saying ok and letting me be with you. :) <I say that last sentence jokingly to lighten the mood but with a slight bit of seriousness. You know how i would say that. You have heard that tone at the end of our arguments often.> My phone is on. The door is open. And im sorry for all that i did. I know i need to grow up a little and stop thinking of myself. But i really like thinking of you. That is a good alternative i think.
That just speaks to your mind and heart and just knows how to break you down and build you back up bigger and better each time you go through the songs how do you take a small piece of their music and let it encompass all that you feel. Ever thing from “Spies and Lovers” to ” My Alibi” is and for always will be me. I do not need anymore music for the res of my life. Thank you RWB.
Now that i have no one looking at what i write and i can say this without worrying about the thoughts of the one person that i care about i can just be free.
The best thing happened to me tonight. Red Wanting Blue is a true rock band from Ohio and they opened for a band called cartel. Cartel sucked in my opinion. They were just so.. sooo…. cookie cutter. Packaged and shipped out for the entertainment of teenagers. But RWB was true, real, passionate, intense, calm, loving, and truly in love with what they do.
A song they played that got my attention was a new one coming out on their new album and they lyrics that caught my attention was: Dying for you isn’t hard, Its the living that is. As a listened the last song called My Alibi made my fight back tears. After they got done with their set i met them at their tent and talked to them. I introduced myself and said I am the new V.P. of entertainment for our Student Government Organization and i would love to bring them back next fall for our homecoming concert. They were exstatic. And we practically talked all through the Cartel set. I bought one of their CDs and told him that the last song caught me off guard and in that moment had to fight back tears. He laughed and i just looked at him and thanked him with a very heartfelt hug. I then asked him to sign my CD and he did. He called his other band members over and they all lined up and signed it as well. They all talked to me about coming back again and how excited they were. Scott Terry, the lead singer i first talked to, came back and wrapped his arms around me, partly because he couldn’t really speak loud enough over the god awful music being played by Cartel that i would hear him, and partly because he wanted to speak to me privately. He said,” Thank you, Keep on man and you will find it.” I shook his hand one more time and began to walk away. I got half way to my destination next to my group of friends and felt something.. not….. all entirely familiar n my pocket. I reached into the side pocket of my cargo shorts and pulled out a CD. A Red Wanting Blue CD. The Red Wanting Blue CD that features the song that nearly made me weep infront of the student body. The CD that Scott Terry slipped into my pocket when he hugged me.
I made an excuse to go back to my room and put some stuff up. I went back and teared up and little bit and just sat down on my bed and stared at the CD i had received. He didnt even know me. And he doesnt know what that meant. It has been so long since it seems since i have had a random act of encouragment or feeling of comfort. That feeling wont soon be forgotten.
So I am a very topic and response oriented person and i know it might take a while to get new people to start reading my stuff again since i am starting from scratch, however I would like to know what people have to say about anything of this. Please weigh in. :)
If you think that you dont deserve me, then that s wrong. I was the most happiest i have been with you.
If it really changed that much than it would have effected us when we were together.
If you dont like being called liar dont put yourself in situations where you can be called one. You said a lot of things like “love” and “never leave” and “it was your touch” and now, all that just seems like words you spoon fed me.
You have done some pretty shitty things to me so if im just too perfect then i can start being like he was to you and do some shitty things to even it out.
I still love you. FACT. I hope you come to a realization that you reciprocate those same feelings. I hope you do before those feelings i have fade.
When prostitutes set their rules almost all the time they have prices for set for everything, but Kissing is off limits. Even when you were making rules about out little adventure you said, “You are good for everything just no kissing on the lips.” People can fuck for hours and try all this crazy upside down backwards and inverted hanging from an elephants trunk while eating a candy apple but it all starts from a passionate kiss.
We fucking dropped bombs through out history and killed and raped and plundered. But Helen of Troy launched a thousand ships all from what began with one kiss.
People remember their first kiss, I would think over their first Christmas present, or even first time during sex. A kiss is supposed to be special and intimate, a way of hugging someone but with a closer and tighter embrace.
it was just a kiss. A harmless little kiss. But i wonder what your next kiss will taste like since i have been there last.
You made man in your image. And you did a pretty good job with the world in general. However, according to the female population you fucked up with the whole male side of humanity. We are arrogant, incompetent, selfish, self-gratifying, short-sighted, narrow-minded, obnoxious, loud, hairy, stupid, inconsiderate, shallow, perverted, filthy, smelly, cootie-infested, and frustrating. So it looks like you dropped the ball on that one. But then maybe your wife wasn’t there to oversee the whole creation thing. oh well, shit happens.
If I could I would take every single one of these words and phrases out of the dictionary and set them ablaze. I pray every night that one day God will send a message down from the heavens and sayth unto us, “Thou shalt not useth the words thus put beforth the less be cast down into eternal damnation, Amen.” - Grey 3:24
Yeah!!! Lets get Drunk and Stupid, You shelfish asshole!
I make the phone calls. I set it up and do the leg work on my spring break while you are down in PCB getting hammered. For what? Well I can tell you it sure as hell wasn’t for me to come back proud as hell that I just saved ADG almost $20 per member just to hear you tell me, “oh that day isn’t good for me. We have 6:00 am football workouts the next morning and the other football players and I want to be drunk so push it back to friday or the next week.
»»Eye twitching««»»heart racing«««»»>Blood Pressure blows up like the Challenger!
It isn’t about you Fucking drinking binge. I dont care that it doesn’t work for YOU. It is never going to work for everybody. Someone is always going to be left with the short end of the stick. Don’t get me wrong ____, I would love to move it to a friday or the 12th because then maybe my date might be able to come but I cant just choose the date cause its good for me. It has to be good for the majority. Fuck you in the ass with a rusty Dildo, littered with nails and tacks if you think im changing the date just because you don’t want to go to football the next morning with a hangover.
1. DONT DRINK
2. Deal with the hangover ( you will have a funny story)
3. Stop bitching
4. DONT DRINK!!! Didn’t your ass drink enough over SB???
Guys are all about the number 1 rule of the world of boys, which is "Do unto females what will yield the greatest amount of pleasure at that moment with a lack of long term regard." I was very good at living by this rule between serious girlfriends, which to this day has only been 4. Still that was plenty of time for me to perfect my technique.
But I remember thinking to myself that not one time did the thought of a Male come across my mind. And when I mean a guy I mean a possible significant other or any type of Penis that would care for that girl and how I was treating her could effect him. That sole realization is the reason I do not like many guys now. They have no respect. I can not trust any guy because they really dont give a shit.
So my hands are tied. Maybe this is pay back. Karma. What goes around comes around. The big picture. The grand scheme of things. I hate my kind.
Holy razor blades, Batman, was that a close shave!
Let me make this SPARKLING clear. I am Uncomfortable. Very. Because I like things people tell me I shouldn’t, the world, society tells me should be considered wrong. But really, when has society ever really been right. Im on that fence with being an open minded hippie and I dont really now how to feel. Its a different way of thinking and it will get some getting used to.
Soooo hold my motherfukin hand! Its like a child crossing the street for the first time. Does that child reach for his adults hand?….
Fuck no! That kid is up in his mother of fathers arms screaming, “I dont wanna go.” But eventually the screaming turns into crying and the crying turns into worrying, then that even subsides until its second nature. But still when children cross the street they do not cross alone. They always have someone’s hand to hold on to.
1: its dangerous to cross by yourself. If you do cross by yourself and truck with a really nasty looking grill could top that blind hill and POP! Please get what i am trying to reference. Cross alone, Trouble comes. You must cross together!!!
2: I need that hand. I am too scared and self conscious to do anything like that by myself without a reassuring gesture.
So we stand here. On the edge or a Rabbit Whole. Hand in Hand. Wondering how far it will take us and how changed we will be on the other side.
Will it be Fun? I like to think so.
Can me make it? Yes we will, Cause if it does prove to be too much for us we can always climb out and be that couple that type of relationship you talked about last night around 3 o’clock. The plain, and Mundane.
Its not sarcastic. Its just a true statement. You are a hell of a something to lose. I would eat crackers and color only with one colored crayon for the rest of my days as long as you were holding my hand.